Happy (belated) Australia Day

I hope you all enjoyed Australia Day on the 26th January



I didn't quite spend it how I would have liked to. The perfect way to celebrate would have been with family and friends with a barbie, beer and the beach. But hopefully, there will be plenty of them to come in the future.

Instead I spent the day in the office. I wore my Aussie boardies (which, no I didn't take a photo of) my aussie footy shirt and my newly purchased Australia Hat



I then journeyed down Harborne High Street to hand out some flyers. How cold it was!

It's now 2 sleeps until the Aussie Barbie. I've been dissapointed with the take up of tickets in advance, although I'm not too surprised. But it does mean that I'm incredibly stressed that we'll have 100 burgers and 100 sausages but no one to devour them on Saturday. So if you're in Birmingham or Harborne on Saturday, please stop by and say hi.

All in all, I'm very tired lately. I haven't really had chance to digest everything that has happened over the last 2 weeks, and my way of dealing with these things in this situation is to put it to the side in a nice little box and open it when I have time. But as I haven't had time that box is starting to get bigger and bigger.

I managed an 11 mile bike ride on Monday night. My first proper night ride, it was quiet and cold and my fingers nearly froze off again. I enjoyed the peace and quiet, but knowing I had this week to deal with it was hard to truly let go.

The office has been quite a happy place lately. Various items have arrived for the barbie, including the 2 Kangaroo costumes, there's debates about how much they actually look like Kangaroos, but hey, beggars can't be chosers.

Next week will be a week to look forward, beyond the next month an hopefully start planning.



x

Decisions

The blog has been highly depressing since Christmas, for obvious reasons. I now have the decision to make; do I keep on blogging through the dark times and try and be light hearted and witty, should I empty my head and my heart of the aches and pains that I’ve suffered or should I lock all that away and keep it locked. After all, are people here to read my thoughts on all aspects of my life or my professional expertise (which I’m yet to figure what it is)

Personally, I find it hard to hide feelings. I come across as grumpy and overly sarcastic the majority of times anyway, some people I hit it off with, they understand that. Other people find it very off putting .But what I despise doing is being fake. It was hard to come in to work last week, even for that one day, because I knew everyone would be lovely and kind and say ‘sorry to hear about your news/mum’. I still have no idea how to respond to that. I didn’t and still don’t feel ok, I’ve barely had chance to think about it since it happened, yet I felt a pressure to put on a smile and ‘act’ ok with it.

Truth be told I want to hibernate for at least a month and try my best to think of the good times that I had with my mum. Yet, this fast paced life we have doesn’t allow for that. This morning I had an hour to myself. It was bliss. And I’m looking forward to tomorrow. I have a hospital appointment at 9.30, and I hope I’m not there all day and after that I want to just come home and be me.

I should apologise, I started this entry with the intention of being more positive and talking about the exciting things happening in life, instead I have droned on again. So, for that I say sorry.

The major event happening is work related. The Aussie Barbie (http://focusbirmingham.org.uk/events/australia_day_bbq) is getting ever closer and whilst everything is booked and ready, I desperately need to sell tickets. This kind of event is not my forte, yet it has been me driving it. I hoped it would capture the imagination of locals, but under 2 weeks out and I haven’t heard a peep out of anyone which is a little disappointing. Friends and family will support it, but that’s not enough.

I hope later in the week to write a more inspiring blog about why I set up the event, and that will be the re-start of this blog.

Update on Mum K

All I seem to blog about is mum lately, but I think you'll agree that's understandable.

Mum has a high temperature and low blood pressure. Physically she is very weak and feeling sick alot. There seems to be little we can do anymore. Her body will either accept the medication and it'll work or it won't. The plan yesterdy was to transfer her to St. Mary's Hospice where she would at least have some peace and the family could be with her.

Unfortunately due to us Brit's beign completely weak, there is not enough staff at the hospice to accept her today. Rather than wait until Monday we are now trying to get everything set up to have Mum at home so we can care for her. At least at home she will get some rest and hopefully have some dignity.

Thank you for all the love, support and prayers. It's been a good fight, we've fought our corner well, now let's rest.

2010 A new start? Or the remains of 2009?

I've never been a big fan of New Years resolutions or the "It's a new year, I need to radically change everything about me for a month and then give up". No, the start of a new year for mehas never been anything drastically special. I guess that's because I can be quite implusive, when I want to change something, I'll do it straight away, I'm also a bit rebelious, I like to do things before other people and if other people have got there first, then I'm not so interested.

I did however intend to be more positive this year. Over the past few years I've been very negative. Ok, at school I was called Mr Grumpy. But, that's part of me, my sarcastic nature sometimes goes on overdrive.

But so far 2010 is proving very tricky. I obviously knew it would be with mum in hospital and quite seriously ill, but I also wanted to be positive in that. Anyway, my new positive blogging nature has just proven useful...a text from my Dad, Mum is priority for admission to St Mary's Hospice tomorrow providing staff are in place and there's no more snow.

That is fantastic news. It will give Dad the opportunity to spend as much time with mum as he can and hopefully ease her panic attacks. Whether it's the beginning of the end I don't know, but there's nothing more difficult than seeing someone you love in such distress and not being able to grant their wishes. I had even started coming down on the side of Dad yesterday that even though having mum at home would be difficult it might be preferential than having her at the hospital.

I shall go visit this afternoon and see how the old dear is doing...positive thinking her we come.

x

P.S. Snow day yesterday was great, will load some photos later. Although, I do think it is quite ridiculous that we 'give in' to the snow...instead, just take it as a holiday and embrace! Well, for a day.

Closing the Curtain

The last few days have been quite up and down. We had a lovely Christmas Day and the kids had a lovely time. But it's all over in a flash.

On boxing day we were due to go to my Sisters, we were all going, my mum and dad, my in-laws, my wife and kids. But mum picked up the bug that my brother in-law, my wife and my daughter had got. I don't know if I mentioned before, but my Mum has terminal cancer. She was diagnosed with a brain tumour in November 2006. It was rather advanced and it's a miracle that she is still with us.

But this sickness and diarrohoea (probably spelt wrong I know) bug really knocked her about. Her vision is not very good and her mobility is very poor now. My dad is her carer and does his best, but he has prostate cancer and is getting weak too. So you can imagine, trips to the toilet every half an hour were just too much. So mum was admitted to the hospital on Boxing Day.

Typically, it being the festive season, everything is chaotic. But mum was looking better after a few days. But yesterday she was being sick again. She's also very confused. Her memory has been getting worse over the last couple of months, but as dad as always been with her, it's been easy to put her back on track. But as the hospital won't allow dad to stay, I can only imagine how confused and panicked mum must be at night with no one to re-assure her.

This morning the hospital called dad to come in and help 'calm' her down, which I'm grateful, but I doubt only just now as she been worried. And it would be nice to hear from a doctor. We haven't heard anything about possible treatement or trying to make her feel comfortable. She isn't drinking or eating, you'd think they would at least be giving her fluids, but it just feels like she's been left there.

I have a few moments today, so I was googling as much as I could and reading the Cancer Research UK site, it sort of dawned on me...that, mum is dying. She was dying from the first diagnosis in 2006, and even though she's battled through so much that maybe her body is starting to give up. I'm constantly making excuses as to why she's feeling sick, or why she can't see or walk well. The latest one is that she could have Diabetes Insipidus, which a lot of these new symptoms, increased thrist, always going to toilet and confusion fit, but actually, maybe the doctors just don't want to tell us, but they think her body is shutting down.

If that is the case, then they should tell us and get her out of there. We can make her comfortable at home or the hospice, but just tell us, so we're not waiting for a treatment that may never come.

So that's the last few days. I'll be off to visit in a bit and see if there is anymore news.

I started this blog for some fun, to note all the ativities I get up to. I'm sorry that this is a bit of a sad one.

x

2 sleeps

I’ve neglected the blog over the last few days mainly because Christmas is just 2 sleeps away and there’s lots to do! Actually, there isn’t that much to do, I’m just lazy and leave it all to the last minute.


Watched Four Christmases last night whilst wrapping the kids presents and everyone else’s. Started at 9, finished at 1am. Not bad going, but we’re only half way through. We had two little visitors at 4.30am, I’m not sure if it’s excitement or not. It’s lovely how they both come in together these days. Noah was swiftly packed back to bed, whilst Matilda had to have some cuddles. But the poor little lady is under the weather. Was sick, not a lot, and not food, just phlegm I think. But it kept her awake and us. So, needless to say, bit tired this morning.

Work wise, there isn’t too much I can get done. Preparations for the Aussie Barbie continue along with organising other ideas such as Guitar Hero, Blind Bowling and Geocaching. It’ll be a big push in January especially for a Marathon-mania project.

Tonight I have a rehearsal, for I am one of the voices for the Crib service tomorrow. Which means I need to run home from work. I feel a little bad that Mrs K will be at home cleaning the house and cooking for G-G’s birthday, but I don’t think it warranted a days holiday!

And then Christmas Day we will wake up at ours. Quite excited to see how the kids react. Usually we’ve been at Grandma and Granddads or in Australia, so to have both kids in our house is a first. I’m quite excited.

And now, for your K family tradition, here’s a quick quiz…


1. Why is the Golden Gate bridge painted Plum colour?
2. In Cluedo, whose murder is to be solved?
3. Which island near Hong King is famous for gambling and motor racing?
4. If you walked one mile south, one mile west, and then one mile north and ended up where you started, where would you be?
5. In which city is Trainspotting set?

Obviosuly, I probably won't update again till the New Year, if I can squeeze one last one in before the end of the century, I will, but until then. It's been a crap year...haha, and 2010 can only be better. So have a very merry Christmas.

Spirit of Christmas

I have to be careful, this is the internet and therefore a public blog. And a small reminder, never check your email on your day off. Let's deal with the misery element first. Obviously the bike ride was a week ago and I spent a couple of days taking down signage, it's never a nice job and never pleasant to do it on your own.

But I've just received an email to say it's a disgrace that the signs now litter the Harborne Walkway. Of course, if this is the case, I sincerely apologise, of course, I don't know the state of the walkway (which was already fairly littered last week with usual cans, bottles and refuse, whether it's been resurfaced or not)

It's always the tone of people's emails like that, does a couple of signs really make a big difference in a persons life, have they got nothing better to moan about? Suffice to say, I will try and get out tomorrow, Sunday or at the very least Monday and remove the remaining signs. Another reason why we should have done a road route.

And to end on a high note...here's another comical photo of yours truly.





On a happier note, we got a good a go ahead as we are likely to get in regards to our 'Marathon Mania' project. Thanks to our overseas runners, they are going to run both the London Marathon in April and Norway's very own Midnight Marathon in June. I'll upload some links later, but it's an exciting project and can't wait to tell you all about it, but for now, as I mentioned, it's a day off so let's have some family time.